Inside porn studio

Here's a look behind the scenes of its San Francisco headquarters. And when I heard that anyone could go inside it — pun intended — and take a tour, I signed the fuck up. I don't really watch porn, for long and nuanced reasons that can probably be summed up as: It's just not my jam. But still, who wouldn't be curious about this? Is there a Clueless -like computer that matches your ball gag to your cat-o'-nine tails?

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If you go there now you'll see a chainsaw with all the sharp edges replaced with plastic tongues, a room full of dildos attached to drills, and two bright blue gallon barrels of natural, water-based lube. One hundred and ten gallons is a hell of a lot of lube. You see, shortly after the National Guard left the Armory in , the former headquarters was registered as a historical landmark. This meant that whoever bought the two-acre, redbrick, Moorish revival castle would not be able to make any major architectural changes, so the building sat more or less empty for 30 years. The trouble was, they needed to find a millionaire buyer with a mountain of cash and a desire to own a network of dingy dungeons, and even in San Francisco that isn't an easy task.

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